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Post by mason on Jan 17, 2011 5:17:41 GMT -4
At this point, Mason wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He liked to pretend that situations would go down in a certain way. In his way, how he wanted everything to happen. Just like the night his brother was killed. Mason planned out that whole evening from sneaking out of the house to Caleb picking him up. That didn’t turn out the way he had expected. Then he moved and Jenna came along. He pictured their relationship to turn out for the better. He assumed that she would accept him for who he was, flaws and all. Everyone in his school knew that never happened. And now Emily. No strings attached. That was the deal he had made with himself. It was a mutual agreement but with every passing moment, Mason was breaking his own rules. Now he was falling for someone he was sure didn’t want him. Well, more so a relationship than him. He had no idea what Emily’s past consumed of and why she chose her love life the way she did. Many saw her has a whore. Mason saw her differently. He didn’t have to know her history to understand and respect her decisions. She obviously had good reasoning for why she choose to stay out of relationships and that was the part he wanted to fix. At the moment, he understood more than anyone that boy friend/girl friend labels almost never seemed to end well. But that was the whole purpose of love. No one would know what was right without all the wrong. Right now, holding Emily in his arms felt right.
Mason had slept with two other girls before Emily. Both whom resided back in New Jersey. He lost his virginity to his first love and had a one night stand just before moving. He could honestly admit that in those times of having sex with the girls, he never felt the way he did with Emily. His first love came closest but he was really too young to understand the concept of that feeling. Even being an eighteen year old senior, Mason wasn’t sure if he had a clue. He did know that the way Emily made him feel when they were together was unlike anything else. This wasn’t just casual sex. This was making love. The first time caught him off guard. He figured the spark came from the alcohol and despite being intoxicated at the moment, Mason knew it was more than that. Maybe everything going on around them fueled their connection but it was them, together, that ignited every sensation. If someone had emotionally destroyed the brunette in her past they were completely idiotic. How anyone could hurt her was beyond him. Mason could see there was more to her than meets the eye. He could feel it with every touch. She was amazing and deserved more than she was treating herself to. If only he could explain to her that sleeping around wouldn’t cure the pain. At least not completely. For now, he would do his best to mend her in any way he could.
Even though Mason wanted to express his emotions verbally, words never seemed to come out right. He wanted Emily to know how amazing she was. And he wanted to know how she would respond. He wanted to know if she was starting to feel for him. Words may not have come easily to her either but actions did. As he held her in his arms, she began to kiss him in a way that was never done before. There was so much passion and desire. His whole body felt like it could collapse at any moment from the overwhelming sensations that she was feeding off to him. He brought a hand to rest behind her neck, intensifying the kiss. He wanted this moment to go on forever and as their lips parted he felt a glint of sadness. How could he not want this permanently? Just for himself? She was obviously a cure to his pain. Why get rid of something like that? Mason swallowed air as he watched her reactions. Watching her pleasure increase assured him that he was doing his job. He was making her feel the way he wanted her to. And whether or not she knew it, she was doing to same to him. Emily was completely unclothed now and even though her body was far from impossible to look at, his eyes were still locked on hers. His rough hands ran softly up her porcelain body as she pulled him on top of her. Every ounce of him wanted her more than anything.
His chest pressed against hers as he lay completely entangled in the moment. Their body heat fed off each other, making shivers flow threw his body. Mason sealed their lips together again, one hand cupping her cheek. How was it that he felt so strongly for the girl? It had to have meant something. He stalled the removal of his boxers, capturing the passion before they would move along to the grand finale. Mason pulled away from her face, giving her a deep look of desire before relieving his last article of clothing. He picked Emily up in his arms again, pulling the bed covers back. He set her back on the bed and laid his body on top of hers. He began to kiss her deeply again as he pulled the covers over their bodies.
tagged'' emily word count'' 909 comments'' awwww
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 17, 2011 17:12:36 GMT -4
At the pressure and warmth of Mason’s chest pushing down on her, Emily moaned again and her legs spread to curve to his body and ensure that he was as close to her as she could get him. Nothing could have stopped Emily from returning his kiss and as he cupped her cheek in his hand, she leaned in to his touch. ”Mason…” She mumbled in a barely audible tone. Emily’s hands tangled themselves in his hair and she moaned into his lips softly. What was she trying to say? How was she even feeling? Aware that her voice was in fact working, she felt the pressure to vocalize what she was feeling and what she wanted, but the words just wouldn’t come out.
When Mason pulled away, Emily whimpered softly in protest and watched as he removed her boxers. Why was it so painful when Mason pulled away? It wasn’t just disappointment or the cold void created by the absence of his body, but actual pain in her chest when she wasn’t touching him. Liberation spread through her bones when Mason took her in his arms again and her body formed to him as if it were made of clay. Emily wasn’t paying attention to what Mason was doing with the covers because her sole train of thought was focused on the stinging pain in her chest. As he returned his lips to hers, Emily gasped at the pressure and warmth of his body crashing down on to top of her. Her lips were hungry and passionate as they pressed against his and when the pain in her chest boiled to an almost unbearable point, she pulled back lightly, keeping their faces close, her eyes closed and her voice low. ”Mason….” She repeated, wanting to say something that would change anything but she was at a loss of what to say.
Emily wanted Mason. She wanted everything to do with him for as long as she breathed. No one had ever managed to make Emily feel so wanted before. Emily knew that she was desirable physically, but no one ever showed interest in who she truly was. Not the way that Mason did. Mason never failed to make Emily feel amazing. He made her feel wanted and appreciated and….loved. Gasping at the thought of that word and the flip of her stomach, Emily opened her eyes to stare into the beautiful blue orbs that held so much of Mason’s emotions. ”I…I…” Her chest was tight and heavy as she tried to speak but she needed to say something. This moment was too important and too beautiful to pass up. Knowing that her next words were not the exact ones that she wanted or…needed to say, she tried to make them steady and loud enough for him to hear, but her body was shaking so badly that it was hard to collect her words. ”I..I want you.” Emily knew that the truth behind those words were much deeper than Mason would probably ever recognize and as she brought her lips to meet his once more, a small stream of tears cascaded down her cheek.
*********************JEOPARDY THEME SONG AND A LOT OF DANCING KITTIES********************
Breaking heavily, Emily allowed her eyes to remain closed as she fought to calm the sensations running through her body. Why did Mason always make her feel so good? Her hands were shaking slightly as the adrenaline in her body desperately searched for an outlet. Emily was warm, even though Mason was now lying next to her she could still feel the strength of his heat and in the process of finding a way to cool her blood down, she kicked the covers off of her, displaying her happily pleased, naked body. Giving herself a few moments to just breathe and try to calm the emotions that were still heavy in her chest, Emily slid her hand across the sheet to meet with Mason’s, squeezing it gently. In the entire extent of her relationship with Mason, not once had Emily and Mason held hands and with the way she was feeling in that moment, it was the only thing that felt right.
Sighing, Emily wasn’t ready to speak. She knew that she was going to ask Mason more about Caleb before he left, but right now, Emily was just enjoying the silent exchange that she could feel between her and Mason. What had just happened between them was something so entirely new and as much as Emily didn’t want to admit it, she knew that it changed their relationship. Shivers were still shooting up and down her body as she closed her eyes again, her breathing finally returning to normal. Emily knew she cared about Mason and she couldn’t deny it any longer. The way that their bodies moved together was so new to Emily and she loved it. She loved the way he touched her and kissed her and held her and she wouldn’t fight her desire to be with him any longer, or at least she wouldn’t try to fight it any more. For the first time in Emily’s entire life, she felt like she had created something indestructible- her bond with Mason and she didn’t want to lose that. Nothing had ever felt as right as making love with Mason.
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 886 Notes: I love them so much, I can’t help it!! [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 17, 2011 23:54:09 GMT -4
Mason began to believe that maybe he wasn’t the only one who had crossed their boundaries. Without becoming distracted from his own emotions, he took the time to read Emily. Watch how she moved and reacted to everything he did. Her eyes alone were proof. The look of desire, want, and need rang loud and clear. Still there was a part of him that wanted to hear it because if the words were spoken they would feel more official rather than assuming she had feelings for him. Maybe if she confessed the truth, whether it be good or bad, he would get some sort of closure. His feelings for Emily matured with every passing moment. The only thing he could do now was either grow fonder for her, with the assurance that she felt the same way or to control his emotions and so how accept the fact that they weren’t meant for each other. The second part seemed so fictitious. How could they not be meant for one another with the amazing unity that they had? Mason was confused, unsure of why his emotions were toying with his head. All he knew was that he wanted her more than anything.
As he lay on top of her, their bodies adjacent, Mason focused solely on the words that lurked from her mouth. He felt her body shake beneath his and afraid he was doing something wrong, he took a moment of silence and complete composure. He wanted to ask if she was ok. If maybe he was hurting her or just too much to handle. He figured his widely expressed feelings weren’t making anything easier on her. If she had been struggling with them that is. Mason brought a hand up to her face and grazed her cheek with his finger tips. He tried to comfort her so should could get out the words she looked to be struggling with. I..I want you. He had heard phrase escape from her mouth before. That may not have been what he wanted to hear but it was better than nothing. He slowly lowered his face, meeting with hers halfway. Their lips locked and as he kissed her deeply, Mason felt his hand smooth over wet skin. He could only hope Emily was crying out of happiness because he wasn’t about to break with bond. This only recharged all the sensations threw his body, leading into a beautiful moment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I like dancing kitties~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mason took slow, deep breathes as he now lay flat on his back. He stared blankly into the dark as his eyelids closed and he tried to relax. His body was still radiating heat and his heart raced as fast as it could possibly go. Wow, was all he could think his body formed to the bed. Sex with Emily had been great from the get go but tonight, there was something different that made it even better. He could have blamed how heavily intoxicated he was but Mason could already feel the alcohol wearing off. A chill of shock allowed his eyes to flutter open and look towards the beautiful visage laying next to him as she pushed away the covers. The room temperature helped to lower his own. Another slight chill ran threw his body as he felt Emily’s hand in his. It was certain that the two touched each other in as many ways possible but never had they held hands. Mason laced his fingers with hers. The air was still silent, free of words and he didn’t mind. No word in the English dictionary could describe what had just happened. Nothing could explain their connection. And nothing could explain how he felt about Emily.
He scooted his body closer to hers and laid on his, facing her direction. He took his free hand and lifted it to her face, moving a long lock of hair behind her ear. If he could he would lay her forever, never speak a word and be completely happy. So much as he knew Emily would be there by his side. Mason pressed his lips against hers softly and then against her forehead. He positioned his body further up on the bed so she could nuzzle into his chest. He had to be touching her, otherwise it didn’t feel right. He rested his chin on her head and his hand in her as he lay contently, still completely unsure of what to say. Eventually the silence would have to be broken. “You’re amazing.” Mason let the words slip quietly out of his mouth. There was so much he could have said but he chose to sum it up in two simple but meaningful words. He wasn’t sure what she would say or how she would react but either way, nothing could break him of how happy he felt at that very moment.
tagged'' emily word count'' 811 comments'' xD
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 18, 2011 1:28:43 GMT -4
When Mason laced his fingers in hers, Emily felt a sting in her chest. How could such a simple and soft gesture mean so much to her? His hands were soft and they held hers tightly and in a way that made Emily reflect on Mason’s character. Her was soft and gentle but strong and protective. Holding his hand was like the ultimate seal on their relationship, like the final crest of approval. When it came to sex with most men, Emily would wait until the absolute last minute to kiss a boy because kissing was so intimate, but holding hands was just about as intimate as two people could get and she was so, so, so happy that her and Mason were able to reach that level of intimacy. Turning her head slightly so she could see their hands, Emily gasped silently and a soft, sincere smile spread across her lips. Their hands fit perfectly together. Everything about them fit perfectly together.
Resting her head back on her pillow, Emily felt moisture pulling at her eyes once more. Mason brought out the beauty in everything. He made her feel like she was flying and like nothing could harm her. He made her feel like she was loved and appreciated and admired. He made her feel good, really, really good. Forcing the lump in the pit of her stomach to relax, Emily sighed. So many words were circulating through her head, so many new emotions and desires and the more Emily tried to find a category for them, the more jumbled they got. Thinking over the only words that Emily was able to speak to Mason, she was suddenly filled with guilt. Emily didn’t want to say that. Yes, Emily did want Mason, but she didn’t just want him physically and she especially didn’t want him thinking that. Words never came easily to Emily and neither did feeling but if she could have possibly been able to connect her feelings to a word, simply based on definition, it would have had to be love. Love: A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. A profound, tender and passionate affection to Mason.
The feeling of Mason’s fingers on her face sent shivers down Emily’s spine. He was always so gentle with her and Emily admired that about him. Mason never made Emily feel like just another piece of ass. He made her feel special and because of that, he would always be special to her. Allowing her lips to effortlessly meet their equal counterpart, she kissed him back and smiled, locking her eyes with his for only a second before the warm and comforting feeling of his lips against her forehead washed over her. Emily allowed her body to shift and curve in to him as he sat more upwards. Her lips skimmed the skin of his neck softly before she hugged her body to his chest. Pulling on his hand and lifting it, Emily separated her hand from his. His hand was larger than hers but not so much that it felt like she was drowning in it, but more in a way that she felt protected by it, like it could cover hers from bullets and violence and badness. Spreading her fingers, she pressed her palm against his and then locked her fingers around him, bringing his hands to her lips and kissing it before allowing it to fall back to the bed.
Emily still wasn’t ready to speak when Mason broke the silence. Her emotions were so high that she was afraid that if she opened her mouth iloveyou would spill forth and she would regret saying it immediately. The regret wouldn’t be cause by the fallacy of the words, because as far as she could tell, she would mean them, but by the insinuation of her readiness for anything more than what she had. ”I want more than this.” She mumbled, turning to lock her eyes with him. ”But I don’t know how.” These words, too, brought guilt to her. Why could she never say what she wanted to say? No one had ever made her feel so…alive, why was she so set on fighting him? Even what she had managed to say didn’t make sense and her eyes quickly darted away from him, her arms pulling on him tighter and her heart hopeful that he would just pretend that she hadn’t said it.
In an effort to ease in to a much more comfortable conversation, Emily retrieved her previous question about Caleb that she had temporarily locked away. ”Caleb.” She blurted out in a rushed voice, keeping her eyes locked on the sheet next to him and her arms tightly wrapped around Mason. ”Tell me more about him.” Maybe Mason would allow then to just skip over her previous words. She knew they were true but she couldn’t explain them and if she tried, she was afraid they would come across wrongly. Emily cared about Mason, she just didn’t know how to express it.
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 839 Notes: awwwwww [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 18, 2011 4:57:25 GMT -4
Every little thing, every little action they took only influenced his feelings more. Mason knew it was wrong to be having the emotions he was. He didn’t expect for this to happen. One minute they were sexually involved by a random turn of events and the next he was falling for her. How could she expect him not to? With how amazing their connection was. He could look Emily in the eyes and easily melt her heart. He knew that. She knew that. But none of it was suppose to happen. Part of him regretted letting his emotions get the best of him. The times he turned to her happened to be when he was most upset by everything around him. It seemed wrong to Mason, realizing now that he came to her in situations like that but what it really so bad, knowing that she seemed to be the only one who could make him feel better. If anything it was more of a compliment. Emily was the only one who could make all of his worries go away and on top of that, make him feel like the happiest guy in world. It seemed as though to be what people called fate. If they brought out the good in each other then it must be right.
He squeezed her hand softly, as it entwined with his. This was the new core to their emotions. Theirs hands molded together, just as the rest of their bodies had done all night. If his palm had been his heart, she would be holing the very thing that needed mending most. So much pain, yet happiness at the same time. It would beat controllably because that’s what it was doing in his chest. Mason found himself trying to maintain how many breaths he took at once. The sensations were taking over again once he saw the smile formed across Emily’s face. That was a good, no great, sign. She admired their connection as he did. Mason could see it in her eyes. There was a glint of hope in his chances. Maybe she would consider the two of them being more than just friends. He already was. It definitely wasn’t the right timing and under the right circumstances but he couldn’t help but go after what he wanted. And right now, Mason wanted Emily.
He fell back into the moment as Emily cuddled her body close to his. He watched their hands dance around in the air, as if they were two people telling a story. Each of their hands represented themselves and the closeness, the entanglement represented their relationship. Even if their hands parted for a moment, their fingers still found a way to lace around each other. That was how Mason pictured their situation. Even if Emily denied him, people came between them, or if they simply just ran away from it all, some how they would be brought back together. The vibe of the moment led him to say what he had. That she was amazing and it was more than true. Mason always tried to refrain from saying anything that wasn’t because then he would be lying. But what he had let escape from his lips were the farthest from false. He wanted to say so much more but continued to hold it all in. From her reaction to his comment, he wasn’t so sure he wanted to say anything else anyway. I want more than this…but I don’t know how. In simple terms, she didn’t want to jump into a relationship with him. Mason couldn’t really blame her but as the words soaked in, he felt his heart drop slightly. The stubborn side of him wanted to protest. Tell her that wasn’t good enough and convince her to be with him. The soft side of him would decided to keep quite and respect her wishes. 99% of the time his soft side won.
So in retaliation, Mason lay silently, still enjoying her the comfort of her body even though his mood was turned off. He didn’t say a word until she spoke again and in need of changing the topic. Jumping from expressing his feelings to thinking about his brother wasn’t really what he had hoped for. Of course, his drunken self couldn’t keep his mouth shut. Even if Emily was the only one he trusted with his past, it wasn’t something he was entirely focused on at the moment. “What do you want to know?” He asked, knowing anything he said other about them would make her happy. “He was hit by a drunk driver while on his way to pick me up from a party.” Mason bit down on his lower lip as he turned his head away. He began to feel his eyes water up from both the rejection he felt and the thought of never being able to see his twin brother again.
tagged'' emily word count'' 820 comments'' *tear*
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 18, 2011 18:23:52 GMT -4
Emily could feel Mason slightly struggling for air and it caused her to hold him tighter. Nothing had ever felt as right as he did in his arms. Their bodies just molded together so perfectly that Emily never wanted to be away from him. Emily closed her eyes and listened as coldness seemed to soak through him. Mason had closed up and a rush of guilt stabbed Emily in the chest. Was it so wrong that she was unsure of herself? Was it such a bad thing that she didn’t want to rush into relationships? Was it so horrible that she cared about Mason but couldn’t tell him? Sighing, she pulled away from him. She was ashamed. Ashamed for allowing their relationship to grow into more than a friendship, ashamed at the person she was and ashamed that even though Mason was perfect in every single way, Emily still wasn’t brave enough to be with him.
Moving away from him a little, Emily pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them defensively, like she was closing herself in a bubble. She felt so weak and vulnerable and even though she knew that Mason wouldn’t intentionally hurt her, she still felt the need to protect herself. Emily wanted to be close to Mason but she knew that if she didn’t allow a little bit of physical space, she would end up expressing her emotions and they would come as a wall of bricks, crashing down on her, crashing down on them, and crushing whatever was forming between them because when it came right down to it, Mason deserved better and Emily wouldn’t let him settle for second best.
Though Emily was relieved that Mason was talking about his brother, the pain in his voice shook Emily to her core. She must love this boy. How else would she be able to feel his pain inside of her? When he smiled, she felt happiness radiating through her blood and her fingers and her skin, but when he felt pain, like he was right now, she felt this hollow emptiness inside of her abdomen that screamed in frustration and agony. Emily nodded softly as she heard the guilt in his voice for a second time. Emily could tell that Mason blamed himself for the death of his brother but unless he was driving the vehicle when it hit, Mason was at no fault. Having a twin brother herself, Emily could understand the strength of that kind of bond and she couldn’t ever imagine loosing that. Luke was her best friend, he knew everything about her. A small rush of tears silently streaked Emily’s cheeks as she turned to face Mason.
Turning her head to face him, Emily watched as he turned away. Her heart sank instantly and she couldn’t stop herself from crawling back over to him. Her arms wrapped around him from the back and her lips caressed the skin on the back of his neck softly. ”Mason…” She didn’t know what to say. She wanted to apologize to him and hold him and tell him that everything was going o get better. She wanted to talk about Luke, her twin, and tell him that she knew how closely that type of a bond was. But she just couldn’t speak. Her eyes were wet and her chest was so tight that she just wanted to scream. As her arms wrapped even tighter around him, her naked chest pressed in to his back. Closing her eyes and breathing in deeply, she forced herself to say the only thing that made sense right now. ”I love you.”
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 607 Notes: gahhhhhhh [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 20, 2011 1:46:35 GMT -4
Mason didn’t understand why these new emotions stirred around inside of him. And so soon for that matter. It was one thing when he fell for his first love, or for Jenna, but with Emily it was different. Maybe it was the simple fact that the two shouldn’t be together that fueled his desire. Them being more than friends was never planned. Mason was still stuck on Jenna while Emily was constantly on the prowl. But it was inevitable that the two crossed paths. The connection he felt when with the fellow senior only inspired his emotions more. What was the point of there being any connection if it wasn’t meant to be? In his eyes the decision shouldn’t have been very complicated. It was obvious they wanted each other, even if Emily denied it. He felt like an idiot for saying anything to being with. He didn’t realize that something so small such as saying the person was amazing was such a big deal. It was in his nature to expect more than he should have. Mason always seemed to give others the benefit of the doubt but that sort of attitude only came round to bite him in the ass. He wasn’t sure why he had expected Emily to react any different than how she did. He knew how she was. He knew that relationships weren’t her cup of tea but part of him wished she would take a chance and just maybe change for him.
Changing someone shouldn’t have been on Mason’s list either way. If it was anyone that needed help it was himself. He felt weak allowing Emily to know his past. She now knew why he was so screwed up. Why he drank so much. Everything in his life was chaos at the moment and all he wanted was for it to get better. For things to change senior boy would have to admit to having a problem in the first place. No matter how much his parents or friends tried to slap him back into reality, Mason only feel deeper into a whole. Coming clean about his alcoholism was admitting that he was screwed up. His whole life he felt like second best next to his twin brother Caleb. While his brother was getting good grades and being the athletic star, Mason was failing high school and take part in other extracurricular activities. Their father always shoved it in his face that he would never be as good as Caleb. And he wasn’t. Mason knew that. Mason also knew that by admitting to his issue he was adding the list of all the disgraced moments of life. He was afraid to come clean. He was afraid of what others would think, despite most already judging him.
For the longest time Mason was cautious of revealing the truth about his past. Emily was now the only one who knew and for some reason it made him feel better. He never wanted to tell anyone. Not even Jenna but Mas knew he could trust Em and from the get go he wanted to tell her the truth. Because maybe then wouldn’t judge him like others and understand. Maybe this was an act to help his chances. It seemed wrong but maybe knowing about the death of his twin brother would soften her heart. It seemed as though it had worked but she still wasn’t budging. Which really frustrated Mason. He was use to getting what he wanted. Losing just wasn’t in his nature. Neither was giving up. His heart only sank deeper as he felt Emily’s body away from him. You are such an idiot, he thought to himself. Was he that bad not to want? He just didn’t understand. Turning away was his only self defense. Getting mad would have blown things out of proportion. Not like they weren’t already. He felt his cheeks heat up as his eyes swelled up with tears. It had been a long time since Mason had cried over the death of his brother. Normally the alcohol would numb his emotions but they wouldn’t go away around her.
There was a short sign of relief as he felt her delicate arms wrap around his body. He held back the tears. No way was he going to let her see his sad feelings in liquid form. He bit down on his lower lip, holding in what he could by focusing on her touch. It sent vibrations threw his body. That was the Emily he wanted. The only who wasn’t afraid to be there when he needed it the most. Mason sat motionless as she spoke. It took him to realize what she had actually said. Not his name but what came after that. I love you. He hadn’t actually heard those words from someone he cared about in a long time. Well, he did but not at the right time. This was when he wanted to hear it most. When they were both alone and completely vulnerable. The shock came from the fact that Mason never expected her to admit it. He felt it would be a cat and mouse game until they finally gave up and moved along. He turned his body to face hers and looked deeply into her eyes, no longer caring about his glossy eyes. His hand caressed his cheek and he leaned in and kissed her passionately. He took in the moment as he pulled away, head against hers and eyes closed. “I love you too.”
tagged'' emily word count'' 921 comments'' we are in trouble now hehe
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 20, 2011 2:59:56 GMT -4
When Mason turned to face Emily, she was prepared for his kind rejection of her words. She expected him to say something gentlemanly like ‘thank you but I’m still in love with Jenna’ or some other phrasing that would let her down gently. And Emily had already determined how she was going to cover for her slip of words. ‘It was the Patron, I got lost in the moment, I wanted to make you feel better’ but no matter what, Emily was prepared for his rejection and determined to defend her poorly contained words. She wasn’t worthy of Mason and hopefully, her crazed emotions and forced distance would prove to him just how messed up she really was.
It was a strange sting of surprise to see the tears in Mason’s eyes as he pulled her in to a passionate kiss. Emily wasn’t expecting that. She was expecting him to pull away and scratch his head and feel awkward and have pity on her for getting attached to someone so much better than she was. Emily wasn’t prepared for Mason’s gentle hands to slide up her face and his lips to caress hers sweetly. This kiss was so sweet and so full of passion that Emily felt her stomach drop once more. Why did Mason have this affect on her? Why did she feel so powerless around him? Emily could no longer deny the fact that Mason had gotten to her, but she just didn’t understand how he got there and why he insisted on making it a permanent stay. Closing her eyes as he pulled away, she gasped a little at the power of his kiss and the emotions he had just transferred to her. His next words made her insides tremble as her hands clasped against his desperately, not wanting to let him go. Emily had never experienced love before but if this was it, she never wanted to let it go.
After a moment of just resting her head against his, Emily opened her eyes and looked at him. He was so beautiful and she couldn’t help but think of how lucky she was to have been able to let someone as perfect as him in her heart. Her lips brushed each of his cheeks, each of his eyelids and his forehead before she planted them against his once more. This kiss was soft and sincere and she hoped that it represented everything that she was needing to say. Pulling back again, her hands laced with his and she leaned back in the bed, pulling him with her. The moon was still bright outside of her window and as she positioned her body next to Mason’s, all things in the universe felt aligned. Her chest was pressed against his, her legs were entangled with his and her head rested comfortably in the crook of his neck. Allowing her arms to tighten around him and her lips to caress his skin one last time, she closed her eyes and wished for sleep. ”I love you.” She whispered one last time as her body relaxed within his arms and sleep calmly devoured her.
THE NEXT MORNING:
Feeling the weight of sleep heavy on her eyes, Emily blinked them open. Trying to focus them, Emily was reminded on the warm body within her arms and a soft smile welcomed her lips. ”Mason.” She mumbled, pulling back to look at him. He looked so peaceful while sleeping and the sight made her fingers tingle with joy. It was hard for her to imagine that last night was actually real, but she took the fact that Mason was in her bed as a sign that it was in face the truth. Slipping out of his arms and freeing herself from the constraint of her sheets, Emily slid off the bed. It was slightly humorous to her that the first article of clothing she could find was Mason’s shirt and a small laugh escaped her lips.
Pulling the shirt over her small frame, she smiled, inhaling Mason’s intoxicating scent. He smelt like a forest after it had been beaten with a night’s worth of rain. Just standing at the foot of her bed, Emily allowed her imagination to picture Mason running through this forest and Emily dancing in the rain. Smiling, she opened her eyes, clearing in a daze from her night with Mason. He always affected her this way, though. Walking over to her dresser, Emily retrieved her most prized possession: Sophia, her Nikon d70s digital camera. Returning to Mason and his peacefully sleeping body, Emily brought the camera to her eyes and clicked her first piece of physical memory of the boy. Satisfaction spread through her as she realized that she would never be able to forget him. Climbing on top of the bed, Emily continued clicking pictures of him from different angles until she reached his body. Straddling him, Emily lowered her body on to him and leaned forward, camera in hand. ”Mr. Brooks…” She sang happily, pressing her lips all over his face and clicking one last picture before pressing her lips passionately against his, hopeful to wake him with a smile.
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 863 Notes: she loves himmmm [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 20, 2011 4:28:42 GMT -4
This whole night had been unexpected for Mason. From the fight with Jenna, to the amount of alcohol he had consumed, to the amazing sensual sex, to confessing his love for the girl that was laying next him. If you had asked him three hours ago if he would have guessed at any of the events that had taken place, his response would be no. It was hard for him to comprehend everything but the most important things were never simple. The relationship he had with Emily right now was far from that. With so many random yet extravagant emotions that leaked out the entire night threw every touch, every kiss, and now every word, it was hard for Mason to resist. Everything had gone according to plan and much further now. The feelings he had with Emily made him realize how much he missed happiness. Losing his brother was like losing himself. If he were to walk back into his old high school very few would recognize him. Not by looks but by his personality and what type of person he had turned into. Mason was far from accepting of who he was now. That wasn’t the Mason he knew but with Emily, he was that old Mason. There was nothing she could do to make these sensations go away. Finally feeling like himself again, he couldn’t just let go of that person who brought him back. Emily brought him back. She broke down every wall that no one else could and no lie, Mason was scared as hell. She didn’t realize he was just as afraid of this. Of what they had. But at the moment it was the only thing that felt right.
When she kissed him everywhere but the lips he felt so much love. Like she wanted to show him in other ways how much she cared because some physical stuff could mean other things. Still, nothing was as real and true as words. It didn’t help that both Mason and Emily were foolishly stubborn. Of course neither wanted to admit their feelings but he was pleased when she chose the role. As much as he was the instigator in the relationship, there were still some things he wouldn’t do. He could tell he pushed Emily to her limits and sometimes out of her comfort zone. It seemed wrong to do but she knew that he was there to pick her up when she fell. That is why he told her he loved her back and meant it. Mason wanted to be that guy who fixed her. The one who would change her opinions on love and to make her forget that one person who ruined it all for her. He allowed his body to reposition as Emily cuddled her petite body into his. This had to have been right if all of their pieces were falling into place. One of his arms rested comfortably around her waist, pulling her close into his chest until she could go no more. His free hand rested on the back of her neck, fingers tangled with her hair. His chin rested gently on top of her head as he began to relax and his eyes became heavy. Mason knew that he wanted this. For her to be in his arms every night when he went to bed and every morning when he woke up. His lips pressed against her head as she spoke again, taking in the last moments of the night. “I love you too.” He repeated, the second time just as meaningful.
Morning
Good sleep was when one woke up well rested and lively. Great sleep was when one dreamt the whole night and forced themselves to never open their eyes in fear that they would lose the feeling of relaxation. To Mason, sleep was great no matter what. Especially after a long night of drinking the sweet stuff. If he got some good rest then he wouldn’t wake up feeling so bad. He only felt Emily slip away from his grasp momentarily until he dozed off again. Her bed was as comfortable as could be. Her pillow had taken her place in his arms as he clenched his muscles around the ball of fluff. He would never admit it but fluffy things made him feel nice. Mason was heading back into another dream, one in which had a noise that repeated over and over again. The noise began to form into some imaginary thought until he heard his name being called by an angelic voice. It took him a minute to realize that Emily was the keeper of the sound and slowly but surely his eyes parted, adjusting to the brightness of the room. He felt soft pressure as her body now laying on top of his and without warning he was attacked with kisses. For a guy who had just woken up, it was a lot to take in. Still, a smile formed across his lips as they met hers. “Well hello there.” He mumbled softly. Once his eyes were completely alert he admired the beauty before him. He wasn’t sure what it was but he liked the way she looked right after waking her. Her hair was in a slight mess, her cheeks were rosy red. She was simply stunning. His hand brushed threw her hair as he kissed her again. Mason could definitely get use to this every morning.
His free hand slid up her body until he realized his shirt that cloaked her body. “I like the outfit.” His hand continued up until it met her hand with the camera. “What is this?” He peeled the camera from her. “Taking black mail photos or something?” Mason teased, placing the camera in front of his face and snapping a quick shot of her. “That one is worth keeping.” He claimed, rolling his body on top of her. His elbows rested on each side of her body as he ran his fingers across her delicate skin. Mason realize he was quite drunk last night and most likely didn’t remember half of went on but towards the end, when the alcohol faded, those memories made were cemented into his brain. He leaned his head down to nuzzle her neck and spoke softly. “Last night…was great.”
tagged'' emily word count'' 1047 comments'' they are too cute
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 20, 2011 17:37:56 GMT -4
Emily smiled at the familiar warmth of her lips against his. Mason always tasted so good and Emily would be perfectly content doing nothing but kiss his lips for the rest of her existence. ”Good morning.” She whispered in response to his hello. Her voice was soft and sweet and there was no way to hide the joy glistening in her eyes as she stared at him. Just looking down at his relaxed, well loved body, Emily grinned. He was so perfect for her. He was kind and funny and intelligent and persistent and he knew what he wanted. What else could Emily asked for in a person? Brining her lips to meet his once again, she smiled. ”I hope you slept good.”
Laughing, Emily watched as Mason’s hand rubbed his shirt that was currently covering her body. ”I like it to.” She said, looking down and admiring it. ”In fact, I like it so much that I don’t think I’m going to be able to give it back to you.” Shrugging playfully, she grinned down at him, her fingers dancing along the muscle lines of his chest. Emily watched him closely as he pried the camera from her grasp. ”That is the one true love of my life.” She grinned proudly. ”Isn’t she a beauty?” Photography had always been a huge passion of Emily’s. She had spent a lot of time in her younger years working towards adapting photographic skills and even though her camera was not the newest or most up-to-date, it’s the camera that made her fall in love with photography and for that reason, she would never be able to get rid of it.
Her smile spread and she couldn’t help but laugh at his accusation. ”Why would I need black mail photos?” When the camera turned on her, she tried to smile but he took the picture so fast that she wouldn’t know for sure if the camera got her smiling until she uploaded the pictures to her lap top. Her smile broadened at his next words and all she could do was kiss him. ”I think you’re worth keeping.” She mumbled before laughing in surprise as Mason flipped their bodies. Emily spread her knees and wrapped her legs around him as he rested on top of her. Closing her eyes, she just smiled, lost in complete and utter bliss. ”I love the way you feel against me.” She smiled, opening her eyes to look at him. Emily wanted to stare into his eyes forever but their gaze was cut short as he leaned in and nuzzled in to her neck. She moaned lightly at the simple intimacy of the motion and exhaled a deep breath, hearing his words.
Last night truly was amazing. There was something profound to be said about the way that Mason and Emily portrayed their emotions to each other. Every single touch, every kiss, every look that they shared seemed to express such a high level of desire that it was nearly mind-blowing. Emily had never felt so much passion with another person and she had never felt such a strong need to be with someone before. Sighing and allowing her body to remember the sensations, her fingers slid up his back and tangled themselves in his hair. Emily couldn’t help but wonder just how much of the night Mason actually remembered since he was so drunk, but she knew that the more she focused on that, the stronger her doubts about them would grow. Emily was happy with this, with what they had right then and there. No labels, no pressure, just honesty and even though she was fearful that Mason wouldn’t let them just enjoy that level of bliss, she was still hopeful that he would.
Cupping his face in her hands, Emily brought Mason’s lips to meet hers. All of her fears and all of her bliss muddled together in this kiss and when she pulled back, she had to gasp a little for air. Grinning at Mason widely, she leaned in once more, pulling on his bottom lip as she pulled back. ”Are you hungry?” She asked as a sincere smile spread across her lips. Pushing against his chest firmly, Emily struggled to slide out from under his body but stood victoriously once she did. Reaching to the floor and picking up a pillow, she tossed it at him playfully before winking and walking towards her bedroom door. ”Come on, I’ll make you breakfast.”
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 748 Notes: she loves himmmm [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 24, 2011 5:33:55 GMT -4
“You have no idea.” Mason sounded to her sleep comment. He didn’t want to check the time. He wasn’t even sure if she had a clock in her room but he resisted to search. By how well he slept, Mason imagined it to be late in the morning but he didn’t care. He had no place to be. No previous engagements. And right now all he wanted was to be with Emily. His eyes adjusted well to the daylight, revealing the beautiful silhouette before him. She looked amazing in his shirt and even though the size was off it looked right. “As long as you promise to never to get rid of it.” He claimed half serious. Mason didn’t have too many clothes. Not like the average female would and she happened to be wearing one of his favorites. You know, that one of maybe three that looked the best on him but the thought of her as the new owner of his t-shirt didn’t bother him. She wore it better than he did. Plus, he knew keeping an item of the opposite was a sign of attachment. Emily would now have a piece of him forever, so long as she never burned or ripped it to pieces. He hoped she wouldn’t want to get rid of it. Mason smirked at her ‘one true love’ comment but said nothing as he admired the camera, knowing they could capture amazing moments together. If that ever happened. “You never know.“ He shrugged his bulky shoulders before snapping a photo of her. He wanted to believe everything would work out the way he wanted it to, even as Emily spoke heart pounding words, but even he knew all good things came to an end.
Theirs bodies were now reversed as Mason settled his body gently on hers. No matter if they were laying on top of one another, next to, or simply standing up, it always felt right when they were touching. Her words were pure bliss but he wanted to hear more. He wanted everything that was expressed while drunk to be retold while sober. He nuzzled her neck, taking in her scent then rejoined his eyes with hers. Mason placed a hand against her check, rubbing her soft skin with his finger tips as he starred deeply. “I love you.” He retaliated, knowing that his emotions needed to be said. Yes, he could recall saying the very same words hours ago but last night he was intoxicated. That didn’t mean they were true when he first said it but the alcohol took away some of the meaning. Mason wanted to make sure Emily realized that his feelings were real and unlike anything he had ever felt before. He couldn’t fight the feelings anymore. He had to take a chance. He hated to be the one to break all the rules but he couldn’t help it. It was inevitable. Mason knew something had to happen. A decision had to be made even if she didn’t want to make it with him. He was only worried this would have to end for good. He couldn’t fathom sleeping with the girl and not feel the way he did. This wasn’t something he could just ignore while being in her arms. The chemistry would only grow and cause more issues. For Mason, there wasn’t anymore of being ‘just friends’.
The worry of how everything would turn out was soothed by her kiss. Emily took the fear away as he focused in on the moment again. The moment where everything felt right and he’d be baffled if she didn’t feel the same. He allowed her tiny figure escape from his grasp, bells ringing in his ears as the subject of food was brought up. Mason could feel his stomach respond to her question and simply nodded. His eyes were focused on Emily and not on the pillow that was launched in is direction. “Hey…” He took the soft blow and let the head rest fall into his lap as she walked out of the room. Mason began to pull the covers from his body until he realize his body was completely bare. He glanced around the room, not entirely sure where he had taken off his clothes. He stood to his feet and spotted his boxers half shoved under the bed, He choose not to scavenge for the rest and headed into the kitchen. His hands rubbed against his own chest, grazing over the tattoos he hardly remembered he had. Mason let a soft smile form across his lips as he watched Emily wander throughout the cooking room. He pictured this twenty years from now but more official. He stalked behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his lips against her neck. “I could get use to this.”
tagged'' emily word count'' 805 comments'' sorry it took so long
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 24, 2011 21:01:10 GMT -4
Emily wanted the shirt. She wanted his shirt and his picture and anything else that he would give her. Emily wanted all of him. Brushing her lips against the side of his face, she whispered. ”Forever. I promise.” It was strange, the emotions she felt just by saying those words and part of her realized that she had just promised to a lot more than just keeping his shirt forever. It was almost as though by saying those words, Emily was promising him forever, and that thought scared her. Everything with the morning seemed to be going well. Emily was happy and Mason was happy and she was enjoying him just as much as she always had and then, when their intimacy reached the brink once again, he spilled forth those words that meant so much to her and this time, she wasn’t sure if she could respond.
By admitting to love Mason in the beginning, Emily gave him the power to hurt her. Knowing that he was a weakness to her was an advantage to him and even though Emily would never think that Mason would make that an issue, it still terrified her that they had even made it a possibility. The way that he was looking at her as his body overpowered her and boxed her in made Emily feel helpless. Her mouth parted for a moment and then shut, the attempt at words was replaced with a sincerely worried smile. Emily couldn’t say it again. Last night, she had been intoxicated and caught up in the moment and extremely emotional but now that she was sober and could think a bit more clearly, she couldn’t say it back. Friends. Emily and Mason needed to be friends. They could sleep together and share each other’s clothes and she could make him breakfast but they couldn’t say ‘I love you’. That was where she would have to draw the line.
Free of Mason’s touch and with a moment allowed to herself, Emily tried to breathe. She had been holding her breath all night waiting to awake from this dream but with every thought of Mason, she was reminded of just how real it was. Just how real her feelings were. Wandering out in to the kitchen, Emily had a lot on her mind. In no way did Emily want to lose Mason or anything about her relationship with Mason, but she knew that he loved Jenna. How can you be with someone who loves someone else? It wouldn’t be fair to either of them. It wouldn’t be fair to Mason because that would mean that he really didn’t like Emily all that much, and it would be unfair to Emily because she really would like Mason. So why even put yourself through situations like that when you already know the outcome? Yes, Emily was afraid, but with Jenna holding such a huge part of Mason’s heart, she had reason to be afraid.
Sighing, Emily opened the fridge and pulled out the carton of eggs and a stack of bacon. French toast, eggs and bacon seemed like a hearty brunch, right? Emily really wasn’t concerned about food but it was currently her only distraction from Mason. Glancing up at the hallway, her eyes examined his mostly naked body. Every single thing about him just made Emily weak at the knees. He was so beautiful. As h e approached her, she couldn’t help but smile and then quickly glanced away, pretending like she was too occupied with cracking eggs into a bowl. It wasn’t until she felt his familiar hands wrap around her that she stopped what she was doing and closed her eyes, leaning in to him. When he spoke, Emily sighed. How could she respond to that?
Turning to face him, Emily kept her head bowed and her eyes away from his. Her fingers played absentmindedly with the seam of his boxers as she struggled for words. ”I like the way things are between us.” She began trying to focus on using the proper words and clearly being able to express what she was trying to say. ”But it wouldn’t be fair for us to get any more serious.” Her words were unsteady as she thought about Mason being with Jenna instead of her. Emily had to protect herself. She had already let down her walls twice with this boy, she needed to stand firm this time. Guilt was splattering her cheeks as she spoke because she really wanted to tell him that she loved him and wanted to be with him and that if, in twenty years, they had little Mason’s and Emily’s running around, as long as she got to wake up next to him, she wouldn’t care. But she couldn’t risk that rejection. She knew it was coming, she knew it was inevitable but she was already so far in that she didn’t know how easily she would be able to get out. For the first time in Emily’s life, she was willing to admit to herself that she was in love with someone and the idea of everything not being perfect terrified her. Her fingers were still playing with his boxers but she had mustered up the courage to look at him. ”Mason….I can’t risk you hurting me.”
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 884 Notes: so sadddd [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 25, 2011 20:47:40 GMT -4
Forever was a risky promise. Mason knew more than anyone at that moment that she wasn’t just implying keeping the shirt. He could tell that Emily wanted more. He could see it in her eyes. He felt it with every touch and kiss. There was no trying to pretend that what they had wasn’t real but was it right? Mason hadn’t been able to decipher between right and wrong for some time. There had been moments down the road, after Caleb’s death, did he feel things were starting to look up. The first having been Jenna. She didn’t have to know about his past to understand him. She witnessed the hopeful Mason. A part that wasn’t completely damaged from his loss. Then there was Frances, the sweet girl who could never do harm to anyone or anything. She made him want to change. To be good again. And then there was Emily. Emily saw the bad and the good. She knew the face behind the mask and didn’t pass judgment. All three girls made Mason feel special in a different way. And the three were short from his grasp. At this point, he was bound to give up on happiness and as he lay half-naked on the bed, waiting for Emily to respond, he wondered why he even tried.
It was obvious to Mason that sober Emily had sealed off another wall. As time passed, he had found himself cracking holes in her wall until it finally came crashing down the night before. Needless to say, the pair were both intoxicated when words were exchanged but that didn’t mean they weren’t true. And some how, in the middle of the night, the girl was able to rebuild a new wall, in hopes of keeping him out. Mason didn’t want to give up. He wasn’t a quitter but he could only go so long without getting anything in return. He watched Emily vanish from the room, letting out a deep sigh. This was only the beginning. This conversation wasn’t going to end on that note. He wouldn’t allow it. Mason was too stubborn to let things go. The bad part was Emily happened to be the same way. Maybe mixing two stubborn and power-ridden individuals wasn’t the best idea. They both had similar personalities that caused them to clash. They made the phrase “opposite’s attract” seem more likely. Mason and Emily seemed more identical than anything.
After hunting for some clothing, the eighteen year old left the bedroom to join his company. He was willing to let go pf the tension as he wrapped his built arms around Emily’s petite body. They had such a great night, why spoil it? He had hoped she wanted the same thing but he was proven wrong. Mason dropped his arms to his side as he stared down at her. She refused to look at him as she spoke, which bothered him. If she wanted to keep their relationship just as friends, with no attachments, then why couldn’t she look him in the eyes? Why wouldn’t she just give him a chance? He clenched the muscles of his jaw as he tried to hide the disappointment. He should have known he was only setting himself up for disaster. Mason let himself fall for someone whom he knew wanted nothing to do with the word ’serious’. But there were something things he just couldn’t help but do. “So it‘s ok for me to get hurt but not you.” Frustration began to build inside of him as he stepped away. He walked out of the kitchen and into the living room where he found his pants. Mason didn’t want to fight with her but all he could feel was anger and hurt. Two emotions he really had no control over. He held his tongue from saying anything bad and he slipped on his jeans, trying to compose himself. He wanted to leave but instead he stood motionless, staring at Emily.
He raised his hand to say something then stopped, placing his fist in his mouth. Mason wanted to say so much but he knew it would all come out wrong. “Why are you so scared? Are you never going to let anyone in?” He stepped around the couch. “No…you know what. I- if you want to be friends then that’s fine. But this…” He pointed around from the clothes on the ground to their revealing bodies. “I can’t do this anymore.” He admitted, knowing that his feelings would never change even if he tried. Continuing to have sexual relations with her would only make it harder. In his eyes it was either ’just friends’ or a relationship. Mason was giving the option to her because he already knew what he wanted. Yes, he was in the wrong for being the first to fall. For being the one to break and push it but he couldn’t just ignore it.
tagged'' emily word count'' 817 comments'' *tear*
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Post by emily ann armstrong on Jan 26, 2011 4:26:23 GMT -4
Emily was slightly shocked at Mason’s words. Her fear was valid because Jenna was an extremely active member of Mason’s life, but Emily had no one else. Emily had no attachments and no other love interests so what would make Mason think that he would get hurt? And then it clicked. She was hurting him. Emily extended her hand in his direction right as he pulled away and sadness began throbbing through her veins. ”Mas…I don’t want to hurt you. I’m not trying to hurt you…” How could she express to him that this was for the best? How could she make him understand that she had to do this to protect herself? That it really didn’t have anything to do with him? Mason was the greatest person to ever enter Emily’s life- she wouldn’t allow him to accept her when she was so clearly damaged.
There was no denying what Emily felt for him. She had already admitted her feelings to Mason and she wouldn’t deny them, but it was so hard to say them in the first place that she was almost afraid that if she tried to say them again, they wouldn’t come out right and then he would think that she didn’t mean them at all. Emily’s mouth fell open slightly as Mason left the room. Her eyes stayed glued to him as she watched his expression change and his pants returning to his body. It wasn’t until he stopped moving and turned to look at her that she really felt the weight of his pain. Something about the way he just stood there, half naked and frustrated made Emily’s heart ache. Emily didn’t want to hurt him and it was killing her to know he was so disappointed in her. Reading the pain in his eyes, Emily realized what he meant by him getting hurt, and she couldn’t stop the tears from beginning to fall. Emily loved Mason, she would never want him to hurt.
All Emily had ever done her entire life was let people down. She got in bad situations and ran away from them. She made boys fall in love with her and then she left them but not once had she ever felt so strongly for another person and never before had she ever felt so guilty for hurting someone. Watching him evade his words made Emily’s heart sink even more. ”I….I…I’m afraid you’re going to leave me just like everyone else.” Her words were barely audible and she had to hold back the sobs that were bubbling in her throat. Emily was terrified of love. She was terrified of feelings in general and the fact that Mason made her feel so much made her terrified of him as well. What was going to happen when Mason broke down all of Emily’s walls and she began to rely on him and then one day, he up and leaves her for Jenna? Was that a risk that Emily was willing to take?
Placing her hands on the counter, Emily felt her body begin to shake. Emily wanted Mason to be in her life, she wanted to let him in and she wanted to love him. She had let him in, she did love him, it just wasn’t in the way that he wanted. At Mason’s final words, Emily gasped silently and tears reined freely down her cheeks. Ever since the first night that Mason and Emily had spent together, she had been holding back so much emotion from him but now that she had nothing to lose, she was releasing all of her fear. She had been hiding from his rejection and using sex as her shield and now that he was taking away that security, all that was left was the fear of rejection. ”I don’t…I don’t want to lose..you…” Her tears had grown so frantic so quickly that Emily could barely speak. Her hands moved to cover her face as she leaned against the counter for support. Emily was embarrassed to be crying in front of Mason and he probably thought that she was pathetic but she just couldn’t process how she was feeling. No one had ever gotten to her the way that Mason had. No one had ever made her feel safe the way that Mason had. No one….had ever made her feel as loved as Mason did.
Moving her trembling hand just enough so that she could look into his eyes, she tried to speak again but the tears were choking her words. Emily never cried in front of people….she especially never cried in front of men but Mason was clearly special. Why was loving someone so hard? Why was it so hard for her to admit that her heart raced whenever he was in the room? The he gave her butterflies? That he made her want to be a better person? Emily would never feel good enough for Mason but right now, the idea of not having him in her life was tearing her apart. It wasn’t about sex anymore. Emily was shallow and relied on sex but the slowly forming void in the hollow of her chest was much more demanding and important than her desire for sex. What Mason offered her emotionally was more important to her than anything she could ever discover on a mattress.
Taking a step towards him, Emily braced her hand against a different cupboard. She wanted to run over to him and hold him and kiss him and promise him that she could be everything that he needed, but she just didn’t know if she really could. Aside from her body being too shaky to walk, Emily would never feel good enough for Mason, but she couldn’t bear to see him so upset. And she caved. ”Mason….I lo…I lov…I-I..I..lo...” Her voice trailed off as she was unable to complete her words and she tried to hold back her tears, still not wanting to show Mason how hard this was on her. She shook her head slightly and her eyes closed as she tried to calm her breathing enough to steady her voice. Emily needed Mason to know how she felt because even though he was standing across the room from her, she felt like they were miles apart inside…and it was all her fault. Once she could breathe and her voice became steadier, she took another step towards him and looked into his eyes. ”I….I love you….so much and I…I can’t…” She paused and shook her head again, still fighting to hold back her tears. ”I can’t lose you.”
Tagged: Masonnnn Word count: 1,100 Notes: love,love,love [/sup]
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Post by mason on Jan 27, 2011 5:14:37 GMT -4
Her words were harder to accept than he had realized. Mason was actually quite understanding. He knew more than anything that events happened in life for a reason, good or bad, and that sometimes those events altered a person’s outlook on life. His brothers death had done just that to Mason and he knew that whatever occurred in Emily’s past did as well. They may have been two very different people with different lives and different opinions but fate did lead them together. He respected her reasoning and tried so hard to deal with it. He’d be lying to himself and Emily if he chose to accept their ‘friends with benefits’ label. The last thing he wanted to do was falsify his feelings, especially right after expressing how he truly felt. It was understandable for Emily to worry about Jenna. Mason still had feelings for his ex and always would but he was trying to move on and Emily happened to be the next girl to touch his heart. She made all the hurt and pain vanish when they were together. She sparked his happiness. Something that Mason hadn’t felt in quite some time. There was no way he wanted to let go of someone that could make him feel that way. If he had to prove to her that he was for real, then he would certainly try.
He couldn’t imagine Emily wanting to hurt him. He knew she wasn’t trying to but his body was in shock from such a sudden mood change. He wanted to stand before her and pretend everything was okay but walking away was all he could do. His action was a bold move, knowing it always had such an effect on the other. But Mason hadn’t anticipated her reaction. He bit down on the inside of his lip as he watched tears stream down her face. It was strange for him to think that she looked extremely beautiful at that moment. Emily may have been upset but she was letting her walls down again, allowing herself to be venerable and to him that meant everything. Mason desired to be by her side, holding her close and comforting her but part of him wanted to stand strong. Make a point. Plus he was unsure of how to deal with the situation in his emotional state. The last thing he wanted to do was push her away like he did with Jenna. Though by his words, he seemed to be doing the very thing. He let a soft sign escape his from his lips as she finally spoke again. He couldn’t promise her that he wouldn’t hurt her. The future was unknown but he knew he would do his best to make her happy. “That’s something you’ll have to risk.” He commented knowing that was easier said than done.
It was difficult for Mason to watch Emily from the living room. He instantly regretted saying what he had. It was too harsh but he had no idea what else to say. It was at that moment did he realize the effect he had on her. He had been so consumed on his own feelings and heartache that he hadn’t taken the moment to take in Emily’s emotion. The anger and frustration slowly crept away as his heart softened. His eyes watched her every move, watching her body cripple beneath her. How could he stand watching her in pain? Pain that he had caused. Guilt filled his insides, knowing that he could never leave her. Mason claimed that there was a decision to be made but the feelings would still be there. She would never lose him but still he restrained himself from engulfing his arms around her. He should have been comforting her. He should have been kissing her tears away but there were still things that needed to be said. He wanted to give her the chance to say what she was desperately trying to form into words. Mason focused in on his breathing, his chest rising up and falling down as she slowly made her way in his direction. The good sensations began to come back. The sensations he just couldn’t fight off every time he was with her. Every time he touched her. Every time he kissed her. Those were the things he wanted to be doing.
The fumbling of her words teased him. He knew what she wanted to say but it sounded so much nicer coming from her own lips. They were undeniable feelings from both parties. It was just harder for Emily to admit it. At least until he had cracked her. It was difficult to do without alcohol but for everything to be real and true, they both needed to be sober. And that they were. Mason watched as Emily finally composed herself. He was finally hearing what he wanted but would things change? At this point, he wasn’t concerned about that. Comforting her was the only thing on his mind as he stepped before her. He took Emily in his arms and hugged her tight. “You won’t lose me.” He whispered softly into her ear as his hand tangled with hair. Mason allowed the girl to cry into his chest if she needed it. It was the least he could do for making her feel such pain. His free hand ran up and down her back, hoping it would help. After a few moments he pulled back and lifted her chin so she was looking him in the eyes. “Emily…I want you.” Mason looked deeply in her eyes before kissing her softly.
tagged'' emily word count'' 935 comments'' cant get enough of them
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